One of the first unspoken rules in conducting military funerals is to avoid becoming emotionally connected to the family. It is hard to read Dana's posts, as vulnerable with unabashed love, grief, and hope as they are. I am sure I am too emotionally intertwined.
It is hard not to be. I only knew Dave briefly, but in that short time, I learned of his zeal and love for his wife. He truly was her warrior, defender, and lover. And he died because love drove him south, never to travel north again.
My wife is my meta-partner. She stands over and above the world with me. History unfolds with each progressive day, but for a brief time each night, as we lie side by side in bed, we stand over that history. We look at all that has unfolded, analyze, reflect, grieve, and laugh. When I realized who it was who died and the pieces came together, I waited until I saw my wife over Face Time and then could barely speak as silent tears kept flowing. But, in the grace of God, I had my meta-partner halfway around the world to share that grief with me.
But not Dana. At night, as she carries her grief to her bed and turns to share her heart with her beloved, she will greeted with nothing but silence. In that world upon a world in which married couples live, Dana finds herself alone.
If something were to happen to me, or my wife, then there would still be our little boy. He carries the reflection of both of our hearts in his own. No one will be able to know him without knowing his parents. In all of his beauty, he is an enduring memorial to our love and bearer of that love to his own future wife and children.
I know Dave and Dana wanted to start their family when these deployments were over. I really wish they had that chance. Dana would always have a piece of her husband in the heart and face of her beautiful child. But that will never come to pass.
Love and life are acts of defiance against a world marked by sin and death. But, when all is said and done, death has the final world in these lives of mist. Our hope is only, ever found in the love and life that cannot be submerged in the floods of death, when Jesus Christ takes hold of His people, wipes every tear from their eyes, and enfolds them in His eternal embrace. Love and life in this present mist are but beacons, pointing forward to that greater reality. May these precious gifts then be used for that higher purpose. And may the brief love of Dave Lyon perpetually guide Dana toward the eternal love of God that awaits those in Christ Jesus.
