Quality Time With Quality People

As with my time with my last wave of deploying soldiers in November, this time with the current wave is proving particularly fruitful.

I fell in love with this particular post last time and have taken an unofficial role in guiding our soldiers around the post. I point out that the American DFAC is better than the Coalition DFAC (probably British food), though if up for midnight chow, the Coalition DFAC offers a few interesting options that an American wouldn't normally see. I highly commend the Italian pizza place here, which offers pizza that is both cheaper and far superior to Pizza Hut--a name not allowed to be spoken of here because there is truly no comparison. At this same pizza place, I have invited soldiers to join me for Cappuccinos and croissants each morning that we are here. I am also trying to set up a movie night to watch Lone Survivor in the post movie room.

About a dozen soldiers followed my lead on the pizza place for lunch and I enjoyed wonderful conversations with them. One of our NCOs bought hot chocolate for two of us and near-beer for another two soldiers in order to keep the party going.

I enjoyed dinner (at the American DFAC) with several soldiers, where I asked each of them about their favorite thing and least favorite thing about this deployment. The responses were interesting, especially as different soldiers produced very different answers depending on where they were posted in the country.

I spent an hour and a half talking with a chaplain who will be joining the 10th SF Group in Colorado upon his redeployment. He offered lots of wonderful insights in terms of future chaplaincy possibilities.

When passing through our transition country on the way home, each soldier will be allowed two beers a day. I love this policy, as it allows soldiers to enjoy this fine libation but keeps them from excess, which is particularly tempting after a deployment. I have already made it clear to my soldiers that we will not tolerate someone being a "Gloomy Gus" (hehehe--I love old, tacky terminology) and drinking alone, tormented by the horrors of war. Drink time is group time. Time for celebrating life, reflecting on experiences, and having quality manversations. I am excited for the opportunities afforded by such a time to care for soldiers.

I was read Malachi 1 this morning as I finish winding my way through the Minor Prophets in my personal devotional time. God tells the people He has loved them. They ask how he loved them. He tells them "Yet I have loved Jacob but Esau I have hated."

It's interested that this is God's response. It stretches back to the time of Jacob and Esau in Genesis, and is used to speak of God predestination of some to life and some to death in Romans 9. After God says this in Malachi, he describes the utter destruction and ruination that He has brought upon the line of Esau.

What does this have to do with God's love? Such destruction seems the very antithesis of love.

God's response through Paul in Romans 9 (italics mine):

²² What if God, desiring to show his wrath and to make known his power, has endured with much patience vessels of wrath prepared for destruction, ²³ in order to make known the riches of his glory for vessels of mercy, which he has prepared beforehand for glory— ²⁴ even us whom he has called, not from the Jews only but also from the Gentiles? ²⁵ As indeed he says in Hosea,

“Those who were not my people I will call ‘my people,’
    and her who was not beloved I will call ‘beloved.’”
²⁶ “And in the very place where it was said to them, ‘You are not my people,’
    there they will be called ‘sons of the living God.’”

Contrary to expectation, God's wrath reveals His love. His just judgment of the world provides the stark backdrop upon which the colorful canvas of God's redemptive love is manifested. How would we know mercy but for His justice? How would we know His love but for His decree of destruction upon sinners?

Over and over we see that God's predestination of some to life and others to death is not a hard teaching due to its apparent contrariness to our conception of a God of love, but because we don't truly understand our loving God and the love He has poured out upon us in Christ Jesus. He hates the wicked, but He loves us. So we ask again, "How has God loved us?" At just the right time, Christ died for sinners.

Mini-Reunion

Our handful of scattered soldiers have been gathered in, so I get to enjoy seeing the folks I visited in the west and north, and one friend I couldn't visit in the south.

One of my soldiers from the north is having a bit of a hard time in light of CPT Lyon's death. She apparently enjoyed a very warm relationship with him. He would rest his arm on her head because she was the same short height as his wife.

He was also going to redeploy in September, but pleaded with every person he could find to keep him here in Afghanistan with his wife. My soldier feels incredibly guilty because, as a senior NCO in the personnel section up north, she was one of the key instruments in moving him to a new unit to keep him in country and moving him further south so he could be closer to Dana.

He just didn't want to go home without his wife.

When he found out that my soldier had successfully kept him in country and moved him closer to Dana, he picked her up in the air and swung her around.

She feels partially responsible for his death. I reminded that God is has complete control over life and death. No one will die apart from his appointment. I told my wife before I left that no bullet could touch me or enemy harm me unless God desired to take me at a particular point. Until that point, I was untouchable. And if God did take me, nothing could stop it.

The same was true with David. God had decided in the eternal counsel of His own will take take His servant David at that time and in that manner and bring him home.

If, then, David's days were numbered in such a fashion, then the greatest gift God could give David in those final months was to be closer with the wife that he loved so dearly. Isn't that what we all would desire if we knew death was nearing? God used by soldier to grant that final gift to David.

And David, in the end, did go back home with Dana.

The Lord gives life and the Lord takes life. May the name of the Lord be praised.

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Preparing to Come Home

I went to the Green Bean today and spent the last $3.50 on my gift card on a blueberry muffin and a two-shot of espresso. Thank you, Smith family, for this generous gift that has been of great use during this deployment, as well as the prayers and love that accompanied it.

My emotions are in a state of flux. At times, I am practically giddy with joy, knowing that I am coming home to my wife and boy. Within moments of that giddiness, I am practically in tears, thinking of those who will not come home. The latest two: SGT Jacob Hess and SFC William Lacey, both killed by hostile fire in the last ten days in the south. (http://icasualties.org/OEF/Fatalities.aspx)

It is not particularly hard for the U.S. to win a war nowadays. It is much harder, of course, to rebuild and stabilize a country. Yet, none of these compare to those moments, years after the war is over, when a widow or mother looks upon a pair of old shoes or a favorite photo and remembers that "the savior comes not home tonight." That tragedy alone, above all tragedies of war, is the one least fit for words.

I got a Certificate of Appreciation today from the unit that controls Camp Phoenix, thanking me for my work as Run Master:

I'm glad I could bring a little more joy in an environment that tends to only waver between a tension-marked monotony and a carefully-suppressed sorrow.

I am coming home, but I barely remember home. Is it within the close confines of Camp Eggers? In the desert outposts of Camp Stone in the west or Camp Spann in the north? Is it in the brightly-lit, windowless room in back of Camp Phoenix where I sleep?

I think back to life before Camp Phoenix and I think of Camp Eggers. I think back to life before Camp Eggers and I think of Ft. Hood. I think back before Ft. Hood and I can barely remember life beforehand--like I was mentally concussed in order the say "goodbye" that final time and to prepare for the times ahead.

I remember teary car rides across northern Virginia, praying that God would take me rather than my wife or baby. I remember a sleepless night, holding my wife's hand until our little boy entered the light of the world and changed our world forever. And then, just as quickly, I was torn from all of this and taken from one desert to another, seeking to infuse bleak environments and broken people with any sort of hope and joy that might sustain them until they too come home.

Pretty soon, I start my journey home, to see a wife who just endured her first adventure apart from her best friend and a baby who has grown through most of his short life apart from his daddy. I will feel incredibly lost, but by God's grace, will look to Christ as my North Star.

All will come full circle and I will return to my wife and baby, though all will be different. We will all be changed. The only constants will be our love for each other and the love of God in Christ that equipped us for and guided us through this adventure in joy and sorrow.

God-willing, I will have opportunities to write more posts on my journey home. Now I can say, no longer with bated breath or as wistful, wishful thinking, that I am coming home. Not just now, but my whole life is a long journey toward home. And Home will always be waiting for me.

One More, Off The Books

I turned my final report into my overall commander (Australian Brigadier General) today. I counseled five people this week (four family-related, one combat stress), for a total of 130 sessions during this deployment, and about 150 including the mobilization in Texas. I prayed with 12 convoys this week, for a total of 109 during this deployment. I made 22 site visits throughout the country, including one to the west and two in the north.

A while after turning in that report, one of my soldiers who wrestles with a lot of spiritual questions dropped in. From what I can tell, he is a believer who has not had been fed consistently with the Gospel from the pulpit during his upbringing. He knows a lot of Sunday School answers, but there seems to be a disconnect between head and heart.

Now reading the Bible through for the second time on this deployment, he has become more impressed than ever by his sin. Especially never having spent much time in the Old Testament, he has a new appreciation for the holiness of God and the severity of his sin.

Unfortunately, he puts too much stock in the efforts of man with regard to salvation, despite what he knows of his depravity. He believe that he keeps certain commandments, but not others. He doesn't fully grasp that the Old Testament saints were righteous, not because they were good people (he knows otherwise from his reading), but because the had saving faith in the coming Messiah. It's hard for him to believe that people who love God as they understand him and also love other people can have no hope with regard to salvation. He also looks to himself as an indication as to whether he is saved and also believes he can lose his faith.

Arrogance can sustain such worldview, but a right view of human nature quickly demolishes all the pretensions behind these assertions. That is where he is at right now. I keep impressing upon him the reality that sin doesn't make us sinners, but we sin because we are sinners. And nobody is righteous or seeks after God. All such pursuits apart from Christ reveal is that we know something of the holiness and glory of God and still don't worship Him in Spirit and truth, leaving us without excuse. The law never saves--it only kills. Finally, our salvation is rooted in the character, will, and power of God alone. We cannot add to the work of Christ, nor take away from it.

We are left, then, not to search in vain for our "great work in this life" (his words), but to find ourselves in Christ and His great work on our behalf through His life, death, resurrection, ascension, and coming return. There is perhaps no greater struggle for the Christian than in finding his identity in Christ in accordance with the Scriptures.

This is what Paul was getting at in Colossians 3, I told this soldier (thankfully, he often knows about the passages I refer to now!). Knowing our continual struggle with sin and Satan, Paul tells us to set our minds on things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. In other words, get your mind off of yourself and onto Christ. Why? Because our lives are hidden with Christ in God. We died with Him and are raised with Him, finding ourselves cloaked in His perfect righteousness. I know that's incredibly tough for us to grasp, since our sin is always before us (whereas we follow God by faith, not by sight). That's why Paul tells that when Christ, who is our life, appears, we will also appear with Him in glory. In other words, though you can't see your identity today, it will be revealed in Christ in the days to come. So:

1) Set your mind on Christ daily.
2) As you do, meditate on who you are in Christ.
3) As sin attacks and Satan accuses, look to the Day when you are revealed in Christ.

By the grace of God, this soldier's heart has softened toward the Truth. Let us pray that continues.

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OPC Soldier Gets Silver Star

A big accomplishment by a soldier from an itty, bitty denomination:

http://www.10news.com/news/silver-star-awarded-to-camp-pendleton-marine-staff-sgt-timothy-williams-010714

http://www.marinecorpstimes.com/article/20140107/NEWS/301070004/Newest-Silver-Star-recipient-defied-death-save-fellow-Marines-crush-Taliban-ambush?fb_action_ids=10152049308803046&fb_action_types=og.recommends&fb_ref=artsharetop&fb_source=other_multiline&action_object_map=[299534456838346]&action_type_map=[%22og.recommends%22]&action_ref_map=[%22artsharetop%22]

The Final Farewell

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZqDpOp6pIPM

The Joys of Marriage

So I lay my heart before you.  It is ultimately not mine to give, but the Lord’s.  He has entrusted it to me, allowing me to do with it what I think is best, and the best is you.  I offer it to you with doubt, but not hesitation.  We are always plagued by doubt, but doubt does not corrupt what is outside of its reach.  [Wifey], I will continually pour myself out for you.  At this juncture, I would rather my heart be torn asunder by you than to waste it on anyone but you.

-To my precious future wife, just one month after our adventure first started (11/26/07)

Some of you have wisely questioned whether I should be putting ruminations about future military endeavors in this blog when my dear wife has bravely dealt with so much this year. Is this not adding to her anxiety about her husband's safety, her task of motherhood, the future?

Thank you for such bold questions. I truly value them. I might not always like them, but my marriage is not my own and I will always need the insight of my friends and family to grow as a husband and in my sanctification more generally. If I contend with your assertions, it is not because I am not listening, but being an extrovert, I think through speaking. The day you need worry about whether I am hearing you is the day I stop responding.

To your neglect (and not hers), I have intentionally kept from pouring too much attention on my wife in this blog. She is blessedly so very different from me--from her introversion to her desire to keep some thoughts and feelings close to the vest. She is temperamentally more pessimistic than me, but leavens that disposition with frequent points of light, whereas I temper my constant optimism with deep, intentional journeys through the dregs of life and death. And while I am constantly dreaming of adventures, she is meticulously thinking through how stability can be drawn into such adventures. I am a rushing river. She is a deep lake. I feed into her and refresh her. She feeds into me, giving me renewed strength and vitality. There is no part of me that does not require every part of my wife.

Behind every post on this blog is hours of discussion and careful reflection with my wife. It might seem nigh impossible, but much of what I write is just the tip of the proverbial iceberg. When I write about Special Forces, for example, years of hidden discussions provide a groundwork for such writing, so that my wife is not surprised by anything I write. In fact, much of what I write is tempered by her wisdom and the insights that only a wife and mother could offer. 

In the 250 or so days I will have been away, I probably spoke with the wifey on 240 on them, often for the better part of an hour. Our relationship was practically rooted in long-distance conversations and a robust friendship, and if anything, this deployment has only reminded us of that pertinent fact and joy.

Just a little while ago, we had this brief email exchange:

Hope your day went well today!

Love you,

YS

Ahhh that was nice! Thank you! It was too much fun. Good day. I love you! I'm thinking of you tonight. You know how much I'm your meta partner? I was thinking about Dana going to bed alone tonight before I read your post. Thank you for being my best friend. YL

Since before our marriage, we have signed all of our notes and letters with "YS" (Your Stephen) and "YL" (Your Lindsey). It is our constant and abiding promise to each other that we are not our own, but belong to one another. When someone loves one of us, we both feel it (which is why I posted part of my evaluation--for her). When someone hurts one of us, we both feel it. That's when you'll see me angry! She is my biggest fan and I am hers. She tells me to lead, and wherever I go, she will follow. I happily gave the early years of our marriage to helping her pursue her professional dreams. There is an ebb and flow to our love that brings the same tranquility as the ebb and flow of a tide on a shore.

Dating, Together

Engaged in Seattle, Together

Engaged in DC, Together

In the Army, Together

A Lifetime, Together

Second Anny, Together

Africa, Together

Throughout the many diverse adventures of our life thus far, there has been one consistent pattern: We have done it all together, by the grace of God.

That's why I can't fathom what Dana is feeling right now. With all I have in my wife, I can't imagine going without. But ultimately, our love is but sparks from the "the very flame of the Lord." And if marriage can be so unbelievably good, how much more so the eternal love of God in glory?

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An Empty Bed; An Empty Cradle

One of the first unspoken rules in conducting military funerals is to avoid becoming emotionally connected to the family. It is hard to read Dana's posts, as vulnerable with unabashed love, grief, and hope as they are. I am sure I am too emotionally intertwined.

It is hard not to be. I only knew Dave briefly, but in that short time, I learned of his zeal and love for his wife. He truly was her warrior, defender, and lover. And he died because love drove him south, never to travel north again.

My wife is my meta-partner. She stands over and above the world with me. History unfolds with each progressive day, but for a brief time each night, as we lie side by side in bed, we stand over that history. We look at all that has unfolded, analyze, reflect, grieve, and laugh. When I realized who it was who died and the pieces came together, I waited until I saw my wife over Face Time and then could barely speak as silent tears kept flowing. But, in the grace of God, I had my meta-partner halfway around the world to share that grief with me.

But not Dana. At night, as she carries her grief to her bed and turns to share her heart with her beloved, she will greeted with nothing but silence. In that world upon a world in which married couples live, Dana finds herself alone.

If something were to happen to me, or my wife, then there would still be our little boy. He carries the reflection of both of our hearts in his own. No one will be able to know him without knowing his parents. In all of his beauty, he is an enduring memorial to our love and bearer of that love to his own future wife and children.

I know Dave and Dana wanted to start their family when these deployments were over. I really wish they had that chance. Dana would always have a piece of her husband in the heart and face of her beautiful child. But that will never come to pass.

Love and life are acts of defiance against a world marked by sin and death. But, when all is said and done, death has the final world in these lives of mist. Our hope is only, ever found in the love and life that cannot be submerged in the floods of death, when Jesus Christ takes hold of His people, wipes every tear from their eyes, and enfolds them in His eternal embrace. Love and life in this present mist are but beacons, pointing forward to that greater reality. May these precious gifts then be used for that higher purpose. And may the brief love of Dave Lyon perpetually guide Dana toward the eternal love of God that awaits those in Christ Jesus.

Funeral for CPT David Lyon Today

Sorry for the avalanche of posts today, but CPT Dave Lyon is getting buried today, and as I can't be there or tell the world about it (though I'm trying over Facebook), I will resort to posting.

First things first, the funeral is at 3pm EST and can be view on the website www.newlifechurch.com, by clicking on the "watch live" tab in the upper right hand corner.

This was the convoy from Peterson AFB.

All flags are at half mast in Colorado today, by order of the governor.

Dana wrote the following on Facebook just a little while ago:

Dana Lyon

23 minutes ago via mobile

Today I bury my best friend... The one I laughed with, the one I loved and who loved me unconditionally, the one who held my heart.

Lord Jesus, hold me, take this pain, comfort my heart, make yourself more real to me than ever before. No woman should ever have to feel this pain. I so long to be with you, Jesus, where I will my broken heart will be whole and I will dance on the streets of gold with my best friend once again. Jesus please help me get through this day; and til I see you face to face and grace amazing takes me home, I will trust and rest in you...

Dana also just posted this as her profile pic. Incredibly sad and poetic. Lord, comfort her as only You can!

A Providential Encounter

I ran into a chaplain today who works over at "the compound" (Special Forces compound) nearby. I told him that I would love to serve one day in the 10th SF Group out at Ft. Carson, CO, which combines the opportunity to love on SF soldiers with the opportunity to do lots of work in Africa, which is the focus of this group. By the way, I love Africa! And my wife doesn't mind it either.

"That's interesting," he told me, "because I am a chaplain with the 10th SF Group."

We ended up talking in a heated chow shack for the better part of two hours. This older brother and I share a similar heart. His idea of fun is to either church plant (which he did for over a dozen years), serve with "special" groups in the military (which he does now), and do long-term missionary work (which he'll probably do after his time with the SF).

Likewise, my idea of fun is working with a church plant (which is basically what our church is back home), serving as a chaplain--particularly with the SF, and doing mission work in Africa. While the work of shepherding a flock over the course of decades is vital, my heart (and that of this older chaplain) is for the front-line work--evangelism, apologetics, field services, etc.

This chaplain's work has been very hard. A much higher percentage of these soldiers are killed or wounded than other units. The frequency and intensity of the work of these soldiers can take a toll on their marriages (though the stats are not as dire as I thought). This chaplain has suffered quite a bit in his life, which makes his more accessible to his soldiers and more capable of handling death. Even so, he has been deployed three times in the past five years (probably because he's so good, in part). Some of his kids are older; some are teenagers. His wife misses him. And no matter how capable one is at dealing with death, it never gets easy.

Thankfully, though the SF will continue to be more employed than the rest of the Army, the draw down should cut back on these deployments as well.

Even with all of the hardships, this chaplain loves his work. The difficulty has continually driven him back to the cross, where he has found the balm needed for his soul in Jesus Christ.

Excellent PT and a tab or two (Ranger, SF, Airborne, etc.) earns a chaplain the right to start the conversation with these soldiers, this chaplain told me. But ultimately, these soldiers need a mature chaplain who will not BS them. And that is the only one they will listen to. The chaplain for these soldiers also needs to know what a dummy he is. There are some chaplains who are so hyped about the tabs and the nature of the work that they lose their identity as a chaplain. These soldiers don't need another SF operator--they need a pastor. It turns out that one of his favorite passages is 1 Tim. 1:15-16 (my favorite), that explains that God chooses the worst of sinners to display His unlimited patience. Amen.

It was on this last point that we seemed to find our deepest rapport. He knew of the Ragnar Relay race we had here and was impressed that I coordinated it. He had seen the advertisements for the "No BS BS," which he found refreshing, and was glad that it was my brainchild, by God's grace. But it was our resonance on that passage from 1 Timothy that drew us tighter. Many young chaplains are all about the tabs, or are obsessed with relevance, or still carry with them the arrogant idealism that comes after seminary. I still struggle with each of those things. But I know my struggle and I am pained by it and find my only comfort for it in the Gospel.

He was also encouraged that I would drop all of this in a second for my wife and children, if need be. The precious flock in my home must always be my primary ministry and first in my heart.

This chaplain gave me his personal email address and wants to stay in contact, as well as put me in contact with other chaplains from the same community. If, in God's grace, this helps pave the way for a spot serving our SF soldiers down the road, that would be wonderful. If nothing else, I have an older brother who has experienced everything I might experience as a chaplain and can testify to me of God's unending faithfulness.

And that's what a young, arrogant sinner saved by grace like me needs. I need those who have progressed further on this pilgrim journey to our heavenly promised land to remind me of the glory that awaits in Christ Jesus and the grace He grants along the way. We all need that.

I needed that conversation more than I knew. Thank You, Lord, for granting that to me in these final days of this deployment in Your marvelous providence.

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Book (Series) Review: Game of Thrones

Over the month of December, I read the five books that have been written thus far in the Game of Thrones series by George R.R. Martin. I hesitated to start the series due to it's size (about 4800 pages), it's genre (fantasy is not my favorite), and some lewdness. But there are few better ways to maintain your spirits on a deployment than by reading engrossing fiction. And, aside from the accolades lavished on the HBO series based on the books, they had garnered attention from South Park, which provides the most sophisticated political and social satire in pop culture today, and careful dissection within the pages of Modern Reformation, which is perhaps the greatest organ of confessional Reformed thought.

As an initial caveat, this book is not appropriate for teenagers, or perhaps even unmarried young adults. There are enough explicit scenes to prove mentally/morally/spiritually unhealthy for those who have yet to cradle their love and desires within the safe confines of marriage.

This series is certainly one the best fiction series of the past decade. Martin has the unique ability, like Tolkein, Lewis, Rowling, Collins, etc. to create a believable and compelling imaginative world and populate it with relatable and developing characters. My wife has reminded me to not compare these modern writers to Tokien and Lewis without adding the obvious qualifier that the actual quality of the writing is far inferior, but I would argue that could describe most any artist endeavor today.

I would argue the most important feature of great fiction is the ability to construct a world that the reader can live in. In this respect, Martin lacks the sophistication and comprehension of Tolkien, and the compelling storytelling of Rowling. But he exceeds them both in his development of characters. I think Tolkien's brilliance likes more in the whole, while his characters can tend to be a bit vanilla. Rowling is somewhat better in this respect. Martin's characters, in good postmodern fashion, are incredibly complex. "Good" characters make disappointing decisions; "Bad" characters sometime make noble decisions and evoke empathy.

Rather that digging deep on any particular topic within this massive series, I will simply highlight a few pertinent themes are worth thinking over during the course of your reading.

Portrait of God and spirituality. As with the real world, Martin's world is dominated by a diverse array of religions with pious adherents as well as skeptics. He does not mock the supernatural--there clearly is power exhibited by these "gods." And he draws from Christian categories to compose many of these gods. One religion is vigorously monotheistic, insisting that there are no other gods but the "God of light," and believes power comes with the sacrifice of those with royal blood. But there is a dark, murderous edge to this religion. Another religion centers around "the Seven"--the father, mother, maiden, warrior, etc. The language here parallels much of Trinitarian language, but unlike the Trinity, devolves into polytheism. Another group, holds to the "old gods," which is reminiscent of traditional Christianity's stability, but is also blatantly pantheistic (the gods tend to exist in all things, including the trees). At the end of the day, the valuation of each of these religions lends itself to universalism, in which no religion is either right or wrong. This brand of theology goes hand in hand with the present spirit of the age.

Love, marriage, and sexuality. There is a sharp bifurcation between each of these concepts. Marriage is a matter of duty and must often be borne as a yoke more than enjoyed. Sexuality is most often displayed in jaunts of illicit lust and taking hold of the forbidden fruit. Somewhere, in the vast fogginess between love and sexuality, one finds love. At times, this vague, ambiguous concept is attached firmly to the commitment and loyalty of marriage; At other times, it tackily-tied to the whims of brute sexuality. Rarely is love attached to marriage and sexuality. Even more rarely does it draw the two together as they are meant to be. Love unites marriage and sexuality, placing the exotic adventures of the latter upon the solid terrain of the former. But the dissolution of these bonds are again endemic of the age, with a resulting vacuity in meaning in relationships.

Despair and hope. One of my quirky criteria for a great story is that a key, beloved character must die. The lack of this element proved to be one of the few flaws in the masterful finale of the Harry Potter series. In the real world, the bad guys aren't the only ones who die, nor is it simply the middling characters of considerable moral stature. Instead, heroes die, often through seemingly meaningless circumstances, with no opportunity for valor. This reality pervades Game of Thrones. I have heard it said that it is a good thing that there so many beloved characters, because so many of them die. And many of the deaths are not noble, nor is it relegated to the men fighting the wars, but to the women and children as well. While the sheer amount of treachery seems a bit too much, this series rightly handles war in all of its ugliness.

But brokenness is not the only mark of reality, nor is it final. In the soil of the most unimaginable chaos and evil in human history, one often finds buds of civilization, love, and life. When war is over, soldiers lay down their weapons and fight with love (hence, the baby boom). They know there is more power in creating and sustaining life than in taking it. In Game of Thrones, the brokenness vastly outweighs the hope, moral courage is often regarded as naivete, and the pinpricks of light are quickly swallowed again by darkness. This again reflects the postmodern milieu that we currently live within. People are less illuminated by a hollow utopianism, but left disillusioned by the brokenness left in it's wake. And instead of reaching out for hope and meaning beyond themselves, they go inward, and consequently, find the same brokenness of the world within their own hearts.

Beyond the great wall that preserves his world in Game of Thrones, Martin finds zombie-like creatures that in a state of undead limbo, wreak havoc upon the living. Beyond the seas, Martin finds dragons who will subdue mankind with their fire. Within the citadels, he finds naught but conspiracy and intrigue.

When I look beyond the walls of comfort, I see a God who is able and willing to save. When I look beyond the seas of fallen human comprehension, I see a Savior who came not to subdue but to serve and give His life as a ransom for many. When I look within the citadel of my own heart, I find intrigue and treachery within my own fallen nature, but look to a Lord not only enthroned over this world but in my heart as well, guiding me in paths of righteousness for His name's sake.

Game of Thrones is aptly titled because truth and moral conviction seems but a means to acquiring the throne and power to rule, and the competition of these truths and convictions becomes but a game in which the "little people" are but helpless, victimized pawns. While we don't know the end game of Martin's series, we do know the end game for human history, when Christ will formally take His throne and takes the "little people," who by grace through faith in Him counted all things rubbish for the sake of knowing Him, and will draw them into His everlasting glory.

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Three Reasons To Be a Soldier

CPT Dave Lyon's body arrived home today: http://www.nataliekirchhoff.com/1/post/2014/01/a-heros-welcome.html.

Remembering the caliber of the man and the soldier that he was--from my own brief memories and from the myriad testimonials of others, I would like to offer a few reasons for one to take the leap and become a soldier:

1) To grow intellectually. Since the military draws disproportionately from the urban and rural poor, people get the perception that most soldiers are all brawn and no brain. There have been numerous studies showing that, educationally, this just isn't true. The reason why many soldiers join the military is for the sake of education, and a result, they combine a budding intellect with a well-honed work ethic.

But this about more than education. As much as our society deifies education, true learning does not start on the blackboard but in channeling intellectual curiosity through the ravines of the real world. While Ivy League academics will wall themselves off in fluorescent-illuminated rooms for years to theorize about whether evil truly exists, the soldiers learns through inescapable realities that it does, and seeks to understand why.

2) To grow mentally. It's sad to say, but Millenials (a generation of which I'm a part) are remarkably soft. Many grow up in broken families and as a result, tend to abide by more of a social Darwinist-survivalist impulse than striving for great and noble causes beyond themselves. For the hippie generation, this selfish mentality was cool and counter-cultural--now it is simple conformity. Coinciding with the survivalist impulse is a general obsession with self-esteem. Many parents become best friends rather than authority figures, condone bad behavior and neglect discipline, and convey the myth that if you pursue your dreams, you can achieve anything.

The military serves as a conduit back to reality. There are rules and discipline. There are higher causes worth fighting forth, values worth pursuing, and battle buddies worth dying for. Failure in these respects is not an option. These things captivate you and make your resilient--unwilling to accept defeat and always persevering. In the end, you have a more fully developed character--less soft and more steel.

3) To grow morally. This seems ironic, seeing that soldiers are at least as promiscuous and noncommittal in their relationships as their peers in regular society. But in many respects, certain moral virtues are so deeply impressed upon the soldier that he has no choice but to live by them. 

A soldier learns patience through a variety of unexpected obstacles. The bureaucracy and administrative mayhem that comes with a government agency means that soldiers might have to wait an extra couple of months for a paycheck or get passed over for a promotion due to a superior forgetting to submit a form. There is also the patience required in the months leading up to a deployment, or the hours leading up to a particularly dangerous convoy, or in the minutes that slowly tick away until you finally grieve at home, away from the constant missions.

A soldier learns discipline. You want it? You might not get it. If a higher-ranking soldier you don't like tells you to get in the front-learning rest position (for push-ups), you get into position and get ready to push. If a commanding officer tells you to charge a hill under fire, you run forward and try to be the first one there. Civilization persists, from a human point of view, because people exercise the discipline to abide by moral norms, rules, and authority. The soldier gets that.

A soldier learns sacrifice. Greater love hath no man than this... To paraphrase Calvin, it is a sad thing when man's obsession with life outweighs his purpose in life. There are things so great and meaningful, that they are worth dying for. These things include one's wife, children, the helpless, and if rooted in noble ideals, one's country. A soldier learns to leave behind the survivalist impulses in favor of sacrifice. A man will rescue his injured battle buddy under fire. He will jump on a grenade tossed into his vehicle. He remembers, even at the last, that his life is wasted on him alone.

In the vein of that last point, there is no sacrifice that can remotely approximately that of Christ. He didn't die for good people, though they are helpless. He died for the enemy. He died for those who not only murdered Him, but did so with malice forethought and intentionality throughout. At just the right time, Christ died for sinners. Not only did He die for the enemy, but His death and resurrection did more than simply preserve life. It brought forth eternal life for all those who believe in His name. A soldier's life and death may grip our hearts and minds for a time, but King Jesus saves and secures them for eternity, by faith in Him and in His atoning work.

Ultimately, I am His soldier, by His grace and for His glory alone.

(4)

Last Trip Out

Just spent one final night with our most at-risk team, out in the mountains. I choppered out to them, weaving through towering, snow-peaked mountains of brown (and unable to take pictures) and came back on their convoy. The mountains surrounding this FOB (Forward Operation Base) are beautiful, though they'd be more captivating if they weren't hiding some of the enemy!

Gone For Two Days

Looks like I'll be making my last trip to visit some of my soldiers. I'll try to remember a snap a few pics from the chopper so that you all can see a few of the sights through my eyes.

I had coffee with a chaplain buddy from the 82nd Airborne today, and he gave me a lot of good counsel on ways to continue progressing the chaplaincy (since he shares many of the same passions and gifts). Please keep this chaplain in prayer, as he will constantly be circulating around the country to visit his soldiers and will likely not get rest through most of his deployment. He has a wife, two little kids, and a baby on the way back at home.

My commander put me in contact with a reserve Civil Affairs unit and I recently put in my military resume. God-willing, this will be the next step. As much as I love my current unit, chaplains are not meant to stay in one place and it is time to move on. Civil Affairs would be a great option for me as I know the political and journalistic fields quite well, annual training is often done in Africa, which is my home away from homeland, and spots are much more readily available in jump school and other advancement opportunities. Such a unit would still be within driving distance of home as well.

Maybe some day I'll be assigned with a Special Forces unit to the Malawi-region, where I can also moonlight as a seminary professor and itinerant preacher and free up the wifey to pursue a funded project/advanced degree dealing with that region of the world.

Just another crazy dream, which is not unusual for me. Thankfully, I have the wifey to keep me grounded to reality and attentive to the everyday details and responsibilities that come with life in a real world!

Frankly, I'm just happy not to be whittling away the days until I die. Even when--especially when--one understands the brokenness of this world, they can still find joy in their work, relationships, and lives. Ultimately, when I hand the flag to the newly-widowed or put my hand on a shoulder and pray with someone who is grieving, I feel gratitude. If this broken world is not the ultimately reality, and it is not, then it is a pleasure to work, love, and serve. Christ brings meaning and healing to the brokenness, and in His saving work and present reign, points us forward to the day when all that Adam did in his rebellion against God, and us in Adam, will be undone by the Christ who reigns forever and ever, with His people in Him.

Chaplain's Library

Update: My lost soldier has been found! Praise God for that great news. Also, there are several more good posts on Dave Lyon at Dana's website: http://daveanddana.weebly.com/.

Review-in-brief of Dangerous Calling, by Paul David Tripp. I worked through part of this book with a mentor at home and went through most all of it with the brother I was mentoring out here. This book is of immense help in assisting the pastor to examine his heart. Sin is already deceptive--in the life of a pastor, it can prove deadly. As helpful as the book is, it is far too long for the simple points that the author attempts to make. His examples of failure grow stale, his lists and key points grow repetitive, and it seems like entire pages are lists of questions/characteristics that are meant to provoke introspection, but because there is twenty of them at one time, and there are over twenty such lists in the book, they become easy to ignore. This book is a welcome addition to the library of any pastor or congregation seeking to care for the pastor. If it was edited more ruthlessly and cut down to about sixty pages, it would become indispensable and an immediate pastoral classic.

Currently reading:

Bad Religion by Ross Douthat. I have enjoyed reading articles by this author for years. He is a former editor at The Atlantic, is the refreshingly philosophical movie reviewer for The National Review, and is one of the two dissident conservative opinion writers for The New York Times. Like most of the other writers for TNR, he is incredibly witty and verbose. The central and provocative contention of this books is that America has not become more secular, but more heretical. With a thesis likely to catch flack from all sides, he argues that most Americans are still vaguely spiritual, but have largely discarded orthodox Christianity (as defined by the ancient creeds). He tends to view the 1950s as a time of spiritual renewal, before the broadly caused crash of the 60s and 70s. I know much of the history of this crash in Protestant circles (which I would date back to way before this time), but was fascinated with the story of a similar collapse in American Roman Catholicism. If you are not offended by some portion of this book, then you are probably not actually reading it. I look forward to finishing it!

And it begins...

(5)

Excerpt from Officer Evaluation Report for Deployment

PART VII -SENIOR RATER

a. EVALUATE THE RATED OFFICER'S PROMOTION POTENTIAL TO THE NEXT HIGHER GRADE

BEST QUALIFIED
FULLY QUALIFIED
DO NOT PROMOTE
OTHER (Explain below)

b. POTENTIAL COMPARED WITH OFFICERS SENIOR RATED IN SAME GRADE

ABOVE CENTER OF MASS (Less than 50% in top box; Center of Mass if 50% or more in top box)
CENTER OF MASS
BELOW CENTER OF MASS RETAIN
BELOW CENTER OF MASS DO NOT RETAIN

c.  COMMENT ON PERFORMANCE/POTENTIAL

Chaplain Robert's performance this rating period has been outstanding. His natural zeal, infectious enthusiasm, and compassionate care for soldiers is clearly evident in his weekly counseling sessions, bible studies and morale-building activities. Chaplain Roberts takes great initiative in finding creative ways to care for soldiers and executing my guidance. I relied upon his counseling insights in determining the level of morale within DCOM-SPO. I have been impressed, but not surprised, by his constant ability to get involved in the social life of the brigade, even the installation, and improve morale across-the-board. CPT Robert's possesses unlimited potential for promotion! Chaplain Roberts served as a force multiplier for DCOM-SPO. Groom him with the most challenging assignments. Promote Chaplain Roberts to Major ahead of peers.

d. LIST THREE FUTURE ASSIGNMENTS FOR WHICH THIS OFFICER IS BEST SUITED.

Brigade Chaplain, Special Forces Chaplain, Family Life Chaplain

(6)

Have You Seen My Soldier?

What a waste!

I found out two items of bad news this morning:

First, one of my former soldiers back home earned his green beret. Great news, right? Well, he subsequently partied and got alcohol poisoning and died. This kid was one of two soldiers representing our unit in the Army Reserve Best Warrior Competition when I first arrived. He was well on his way to having an illustrious Army career.

Moderation in drinking isn't only a matter of biblical principle of Christians, it is also a point of wisdom for all people. Ad campaigns generally only touch drinking and driving and don't touch upon the irresponsibility of getting drunk, period. It's all fun and games until someone wakes up in a bed with a stranger, finds a couple of teeth missing from a fight, awakes in a hospital after getting their stomach pumped, or dies.

This kid could have been a hero. He lost it all without even firing his weapon.

Second, one of my soldiers who redeployed in November is missing: http://www.capitalgazette.com/news/annapolis/police-seek-information-to-help-find-missing-annapolis-man/article_8284bc45-3d32-5fdf-9bfd-699b91b2fada.html.

I hope and pray that this soldier is safe and well. I have done a couple of dozen funerals and picked him up/dropped him off at his home in Annapolis for one of them. God willing, his funeral will not be my next.